SOPA and stuff

SOPA is easily the most important thing happening in my world right now. If you've never heard about SOPA, congratulations; you've failed my litmus test for being someone who gives enough of a damn about the Internet or government for me to give a damn about you. If you're still with me, you understand the basic issue here. You know that SOPA gives any business with a litigation budget the tools necessary to stifle competition and crush emerging markets. You know that it is opposed by virtually every new media company, but supported by the trade associations behind movies, music, video games, and old media. You know that support for the bill is waning, but it will still come to vote in two different forms over the next few weeks.

Here's what you don't know: there is a story that's not being run in any newspapers because the stated purpose of this bill is so trivial, only diehard contrarians are assholish enough to believe that the bill actually, you know, stops online piracy. The story is this: People who want to pirate, will pirate. We, yes "we", will always pirate, and always be successful. This is a total Red Queen's race. For every layer of copy protection, lawsuits, and bureaucratic bullshit you pile on the backs of regular consumers in order to protect your intellectual property (hah!) from someone like me, I will invent new ways to get what I want and derive MORE enjoyment from it as I defeat your protections along the way. If SOPA passes, it will change the Internet as you know it. But not as I know it.

My Internet includes obscure github repositories that are automatically updated with the IP addresses of compromised home computers, just waiting to be slaved to replicate my hard drive full of bootleg movies and music. My Internet includes "underground" IRC channels full of channel bots hawking the direct connection details for grabbing the latest post-production footage of The Avengers, like a new-millennium version of Newsies. My Internet includes darknets, lawless voids where 20-somethings practice shadow magic, hone ninja skills, and pretty much do whatever-the-fuck-we-want. SOPA will not and can not do anything about this. But your Internet? Your Internet is *all* fucked up.

Why do I give a shit? Because pretty soon, the creative skills I've honed being an Internet felon will be put to use to build YOU something. Something that will change your life for the better. But I can't GIVE it to you if the only Internet worth using is reserved for ubernerds like me.